separating water.

Now that I'm not near Rowan during the weekdays, I've taken to bringing him into the shower with me. When he was a baby and S wasn't there, I'd set Rowan outside the shower in his bouncer and sing to him from inside. When Rowan got too big for the bouncer, I could still bring him into the bathroom with me; he'd play for a very short time before starting to swat the water inside the toilet or pull open the shower curtain.

For a while, I finished up my showers by filling the bath and calling for S to bring Rowan to me. Now I just sit the boy down in the tub while I shower. This evening while we were doing just that, it hit me: How exquisite it is that we are so together and yet so apart. Closeness, like reading with your spouse or writing with a friend.

I washed my hair, brushed my teeth, and daydreamed. (I know, I know. I don't take short showers, but I do recycle and do a bunch of other things to reduce waste.) Rowan played with his toys (those attached to his body and not). He clapped the stacking cups together, attempted stacking, squeezed the happy-faced bath fauna, and babble-talked whenever the mood struck. When he looked up at me with his wide eyes, I couldn't stop thinking: You are my little angel.

It's not that I don't still like to take a shower alone every now and again. But I also cherish these quiet moments we share, where we are wholly submerged in the now.

Around this time (12-18 months), babies hit the separation anxiety stage. They're realizing that "mommy and me aren't one. We are separate." It's one of the baby milestones, but I don't think it's happening to Rowan all by himself. I wonder if all moms stumble through the same realization with their babies at some point. We are so together, yet so apart.

Mamas, how did you juggle showering with your infants?


Claire Kiefer said...

What sweet images. He is a doll and I want to see him ASAP. So sorry I've been woefully out of touch. Matt and I would love to see you and your boys soon . . . anytime, really. And I think it's so wonderful that Rowan is his own separate being . . . who is growing into an interesting, independent person!

Oh! Jasper got a little teeny plant last weekend and named it "Rowan." :)

OneCraftyFox said...

LOL, I indulge in long showers too... but I make up for it by being very "green" everywhere else... including having sold my car. I live in the city, there is subway, bus, train... and autoshare. :)

Stacey said...

i did the same thing you did in the beginning then as he started walking, i would just wait until he's taking a nap and then i'd shower or i'd place him in his playroom (that has gates) and then i'd shower. i doubt i would've been able to leave him to explore while i'm in the shower- he little hands would be elbow deep in the toilet water or the tissue would be completely off its roll...Rowan is much better behaved:-)

Stacey said...

oh and i think i had more separation anxiety than zion did:-)

DolceDreams said...

Oh boy...I would bring the bouncy thing in, but then I remember there were days as they got older that I couldn't shower unless someone else was home...curious hands and wandering feet prohibited it! You are embarking into a very "active" can feel crazy, but in looking back it goes so fast, and they get old so quick...breath and enjoy!

Stephanie said...

I did the exact same thing as you. Now that Avery is almost 4 she showers by herself, but I always tell her she can come and chat with me while I'm in the shower. Sometimes she just sits on the toilet and talks while I'm in shower. Happy times. : )


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