going back to work after having a baby.

As I left the house yesterday morning, sniffling, I thought I might vomit. Driving south on the freeway, I wondered What the hell? I won't even be leaving R for that long? He'd been flat out refusing the bottle every time his dad tried to feed him. So, I did worry about him eating. But mostly I was just sad. 


I wondered if there was more to it than mere baby-momma separation anxiety. I'm also back in the States, commuting the 880 super ghetto highway to my former career, impermanently. Kind of like going back to a life you once ran away from. Maybe it was just first-day jitters. Or a big fat all of the above. 


{daisies}
Pretty soon, I was navigating that ancient ant maze of my life like a pro. Before nightfall, I was washing Rowan's neck (not an easy task with all those rolls!), as he stamped his foot like old toro, splashing in the warm water of his bath. We made it. 


Thank you so much for your sympathetic, loving comments yesterday. Boy, are you ever a helpful dose to the day!

19 comments:

:: Lavender's Green :: said...

You did it! How do you feel now that the first day nerves are out of the way?

x Jasmine

Hollie said...

aww, I'm glad it wasn't too bad! Change, regardless of what or why, always makes me a little nervous.

gracey said...

you're never such a tiresome being. and never a tiresome mom will be. :)
hope you'll go through the week smoothly!

Kristin H said...

Oh... That must be so hard dear Heather. My kids are 4 and 2 and I am still finding excuses to go back to work. I am making my blog my work now... hopefully one day I can start my own gallery or become a dealer.
I am feeling for you!!!! Lots of love to you and your little one. I am sure it will be ok!!!

DolceDreams said...

Good for you! Glad it ended well...
Nathalie

Claire Kiefer said...

I giggled at all those rolls! I love your rolly polly baby. And I miss him.

Lady Grey said...

Good luck with the transition period... sounds like you're already doing great!
xo

Di said...

Well done!! Now that hardest part is over!

Kavery said...

Hats off to you - it's always hard going back after a while. But seeing your baby at the end of the day must make up for it.

Gracie said...

I can't even imagine how you felt to go back to work and leaving your little one. But you did it :) Would love to hear more about how it felt and how you made it. x

Krystal said...

aww what a lame day!!! all back to being ok???

Leeann @ Join the Gossip said...

Well congrats and getting through the first day! Sounds like it went pretty well :) Hope today is just as awesome!

Lindsey said...

Awwww. I'm so glad you made it! You're such a good mommy.

Graham said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jess said...

Congrats on a successful first day away - hope it gets easier!

aiz kim said...

I could totally feel you on this one. I was a wreck when i went back to work while my son was a few months old. It caused too much anxiety for me i couldn't focus on work....but the words of my mom did help a lot. She said " geez don't worry about a thing...babies should also get a little bit of space from their moms. That way, they could get closer to other members of the family too!"

Stacey said...

I have been buried with grading papers so i have missed quite a bit. I can relate to your feelings on this one in a big way! It's even worst for me because Baby Z is in daycare and i really hate leaving him there. It's been a bit over 2 months since i returned to work and it has gotten a bit better. I don't cry every morning when i drop him off, etc. However, as soon as work ends, i am zipping through that door to get my baby since i've missed him so much all day! I am here for you girl, we can cry together:-). XX

LatteLisa said...

I'm glad you made it through the day, I was sure you would.

So, how do you feel about going back to the life you escaped from? I'm pretty sure a very different person returned ;-)

Jen said...

So glad that first day away is behind you! :)

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