hello, toddlerhood.


Dear Rowan,

Welcome to toddlerhood. I bet nobody ever actually says that to a toddler. That welcome is saved for said tot's parents.

For a year people have been saying, it will get better, it will be so much more fun. And I usually thought, but it's not so bad now. However, what they say is true. This is a really fun age. The blooms of communication are so tangible between us, it's like I can reach up and pluck a flower for you to smell. We understand each other, and that, dearheart, is an superb feeling.

And it's such a special exchange, because--for now--we ((you and me) + (papa, you, and me)) are truly in our own world. We know what your barking sounds like and that you bark whenever you see any animal. We know that you do this because we often look at dogs in the picture books and ask: Rowan, what does a dog say? Arf Arf.

Some things are more obvious, like when you bring your shoes to the door and try to put them on. Obviously you want to go outside. Arms up is up. Nmmm numm nmmm + the more sign closer to your mouth means eat.

Then there are the more nuanced wishes, which an onlooker may not decipher. Like knowing the difference between your milk sign and bye-bye wave. And that bye-bye means Good night, or I'm ready for bed.  That grunting to get my attention while twisting your wrists above your head with pointer and thumb together in what looks to be the beginning of the sweetest little pirouette means, Mama, please sing. And that only mama knows the story behind this made-up sign of yours.

Of course I've felt blunted by those moments of doubt, times where I set to fretting whether you'll ever sleep several hours in a row at night, or if you'll ever lay stand still for a diaper change. But your sleeping has improved organically, without us having to do anything drastic. Even when you kick and cry during a diaper change, you know how to help me--and you do. When I ask for hugs, you give me hugs. When we go to kiss daddy good night, you lean in for a kiss.

I love you, my little angel, who sometimes likes to scream.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

That was obviously today's dose of beautiful words. Love that photo of Rowan and I just can't believe how fast he's grown.

Have a wonderful weekend, Heather ;-)

a little black cloud in a dress said...

I loved every word of this. I often think about how no one, other than Bryan & I, truly know Emma. As a result of staying home with her for the last 3.5 years, I sometimes feel like I know her better than she knows herself. It's such an amazing connection.

this free bird said...

Oh Heather.

OneCraftyFox said...

Oh my goodness, little Rowan has grown up so fast!! Thank you for sharing every moment of your journey with us, I have loved watching him grow :)

Lila said...

You just bring me back to when my kiddos were toddlers. I loved that age. I often wondered what people meant by terrible twos (well with my son anyways)
He is getting so big.

Di said...

Toddlerhood! Fun times......and beautifully expressed!
Enjoy it Rowan!

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